And let the testing begin!

Jeremiah has had a rough couple of days. You know that amazing, inspired listening ladder God put in my brain to create? Yeah, we’ve definitely been using it. The first few days Miah kept his place at the top three rungs. These past few days have been spent on the bottom two. Ick!

Last night there were showering issues. Lying about being in the shower while actually being fully dressed and letting the water run. Getting in the shower, getting head wet, but not washing. Lying about not washing after Mom discovers (quite easily) that there was no washing. Getting back in the shower and again lying about washing. FINALLY washing after Mom stands by shower with step by step washing instructions. And YES this kid DOES know how to wash on his own.

It was a bit ridiculous.

This morning, continual silliness and instruction avoidance. The cute stuff is not going to fly kiddo. Once finally in the car, they sympathy ploy.

“Mom, I don’t think I’m the right son for you.”  in his best cutesie voice EVER!

Good try buddy. I think I said something amazingly brilliant about how God has chosen him to be part of our family and how Dad and I have to be tough because it’s the job God has given us.

God is teaching me a lot about mom-ing right now.  I am hoping this evening is better.

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Ch ch ch ch ch changes

A year ago we were kid-less. We were working toward adopting a little girl. I was finishing up teaching summer school and looking for a more permanent job. My sister was just coming back from China, and my hubby was traveling a lot, so my critters kept me company.

Now, only 12 months later, I am Mom to two boys.  The little girl is no longer in the picture, although I think of Grace often. Just after I celebrate my 1 year anniversary at my first grown-up job, I will be laid off. I am waiting to get a phone call that will tell me whether the dream job I interviewed for will come through.  My sister is home and working crazy hours so I still barely get to see her, but thankfully my hubby is traveling less and is able to spend much more time with his growing family.

God is a god of adventure. I truly believe that. This whirlwind of a year is evidence.

I am waiting to see who or what comes next and praying for grace and joy along the way.

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Jeremiah’s Home Coming Day! (Part 1) Updated

Jeremiah comes home today! FOR GOOD!!!

(Insert crazy happy dance here)

I have been in major mom-prep-mode for the past few days.

One of the things we realized after Gabe came home  is that our boys can not handle “normal” freedom and typical discipline. the need to know what’s expected of them and what the consequences will be in far more detail than typical children. So, we learned our lesson and are putting a motivation system in place with Miah right away.

This is the motivation system that I believe the Lord gave me for Jeremiah.

This chart was totally inspired. One of those things that you just feel comes from the outside in and then through your fingers. I brought it to Office Max and had them print it on 11×14 poster paper and then laminate it so that we can write the privileges in the boxes on the left with dry erase markers and change them as needed. Total cost was $3.48, plus little velcro dots. We are hoping it will help wean our little guy off of the point system he’s been on for the past 2 years.

So, tonight’s the night. This little guy will officially be part of the household. Our adventure begins!

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“This makes me feel like the first day of school!”

I dropped my baby boy off at day camp this morning. He was so brave, but very obviously nervous.

We made his lunch last night. PB&J on whole grain bread, freshly picked pea pods, and freshly picked blueberries. Very nutritious, but also very fibrous. Maybe not the best choice for a kid who has never been to day camp before.

The conversation this morning was as follows:

“Sorry, Mom. I’m a little gassy.”

“Are you a little nervous?”

“Nooo….” With a nervous giggle.

We’ll see how he is after I pick him up.

He was nervous last night. He was afraid he would do something to get into trouble. I told him all he needed to do was put on his listening ears and follow instructions and he would be fine. He was afraid he wouldn’t make any friends.

“You’re a great kid! What’s not to like?”

Jeremiah had a tough day yesterday. I think Gabe was getting a kick out of it, because for once he was not the one under the parental microscope. Kaleb and I were very grateful that Gabe stepped up to the leader position when Miah was having such a rough time. Jeremiah has never stayed longer than a weekend before, so his internal clock was telling him it was time to go back to the group home. He even told me at one point “I think I should go back ‘cuz I can’t behave.”  Good try, buddy. We love you and you are staying.

I did discover that Miah is incredibly talented at speed-cleaning…when he wants to. His room is officially unpacked and organized. Way to go! This morning he brought down his back pack and neatly folded extra clothes and bragged “My room is still neat!” It’s a good thing to take pride in, especially for this usually messie little guy. As we left, he also smiled and said “This (backpack) makes me feel like the first day of school!” Keep that enthusiasm, kiddo.

So today was a big step for him. I can’t wait to hear his stories, of which he will have plenty. I haven’t gotten any emergency calls, so that’s a good sign.

Blessings!

Hannah

***Update***

I decided to give Jeremiah a mohawk last night. My absent-minded brain forgot to take pictures. I will make sure to take some today.

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Rushing wind blow through this house…

blowing out the dust within.

Wind. Growing up on the Florida coast, I know winds power. It can be destructive and cause insurmountable chaos.

And then there’s the wind that has been rushing through this house this weekend. A wonderful sweet breeze, bringing incredible fragrance and coolness as we finally get some summer temperatures.  It reminds me of God’s whispers of peace. It’s been pretty stormy in this house lately with so much stress, change, and chaos, but the wind reminds me of God’s continual whispers of peace.

We are better today. The trauma of this past week has faded. I still have a smashed bumper, and job crap is still happening for both of us, but we have renewed perspective. Renewed intimacy. It’s a good thing.

We got to go to the lake yesterday. FINALLY! The first spot we went to was short lived because of the frigidly cold water, but I am glad we went because I got to see and pet an Irish Wolfhound. My favorite breed EVER! I also got to chat with another local adoptive mom who just brought her son home from Haiti two months ago. This is there second Haitian child, and I am obsessed with Haiti, so I love to chat with her. If the Lord ever does lead us to adopt internationally, I know who to talk to .

Anywho, we got a tip from Kaleb’s papa that the water was warmer at another beach. I figure it’s because this beach is in a bay. Anywho, the water was indeed warmer and we got to swim for a good hour before Rachel had to be back for work. The cool water felt so good. I’m not very athletic, but I am a great swimmer, so it felt good for my muscles to be doing what they love to do.

Kaleb tried to get the boys to let him launch them into the water. I was surprised at how scared they both were. My adventurous, dare devil boys? Not want to do something daredevil-ish? He got one good launch out of each of them, and then they were done. We’ll have to work on that.

Anywho, I am glad that the weekend was a refreshing one. We needed it so badly. This next week is Jeremiah’s official move-in week, although he already has most of his stuff here. He is so excited. So are we.

It’s an adventure. I’m just glad I don’t have to go on it alone.

Blessings!

Hannah

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It’s a grrr week continued

So yesterday was tough. Today would prove to be tougher.

Got in a minor fender bender. First thing that goes through my mind is Kaleb’s gonna be pissed . It’s been one of those weeks. Everything is on edge. Every decision being questioned. It’s both of us. Both of us are cranky. I just tend to go internal, where as his upset-ness tends ot be more visible. Me, it ends up coming out in tears later on about something stupid. Then it all comes spilling out.

But I digress.

I got in a minor fender bender. I was turning right with a bunch of other cars on a green light when the truck in front of me stopped very suddenly. I hit their bumper. I was going very slow, but the impact still pushed me back a little. I turned on my signal to pull over, but the truck kept going. Did they even feel it? Apparently not. I decided to drive the 1 block to my office. I surveyed the damage. My bumper is cracked and the shiny stuff displaced, but nothing major. Nothing structural. I went into my office to call my insurance company (not the cops. I’ll get to that later.) but didn’t get the chance because I was immediately pulled aside by our office assistant and told that our Executive Director wanted to speak to us, and that it was bad news. How bad? Well, the way M. described it was that she asked our boss on a scale of 1 to 10 how bad, 1 being we get a cookie, and 10 being excruciatingly, painfully bad, how bad? It was a 10. Not good.

So, I work for a non-profit. A non-profit who’s funding depends on a funding corporation. A non-profit who’s funding is always in the balance depending on the state’s grants etc… Did I mention I live in Michigan? The state with the highest unemployment rate in the country? The state making the news a lot, and not usually in good ways?

So, our funding is being cut. We just found out today that as of October 1st, my job, and the equivalent specialists across the state will probably not exist any more.No more job. Ick!

The blessing is that God decided to give me a prequel of his providence by giving me a call yesterday from an organization that wants me to interview for a  teaching position at a new preschool, and for a very competetive wage. Possibly even equivalent to what I’m making now. AND TEACHING!!!! YAY!!!! And they called me! The program director for the whole organization called me and said that she was impressed with me through the interactions we’ve had through my current position and she wanted to make sure she gave me a call. There are limited positions available, so she wanted to make sure I was on the short list. That’s a good sign, right?

So my heart has hope, but it is also very overwhelmed with a very overwhelming, emotionally taxing week.

But let’s end by couting our blessings

• Jeremiah is home. He is almost home for good. He is being the sweetest, happiest little boy and I am so glad that I get to experience his love.
• The fender bender today was very minor. The police officer didn’t even think it was worth a write-up. Especially since the pick-up drove off.
• God gave me an interview before I even knew I needed one.
• There are more blessings coming than I could ever imagine.

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It’s a grrr week

It’s been a tough week. Lots of grouchies. Lots of little temper tantrums from two stressed out adults. Lots of attempting to keep our cool. And very little of it has to do with kids.

The good news is, Jeremiah is home! Almost for good. He has to go back to the group home next week for two more nights, and then he’s ours. FOREVER!

Also, even though we are stressed, there are still lots of hugs and kisses to share between me and my amazing hubby.

If you think of us, pray for peace in our household and, as always, lots and lots of wisdom.

Blessings!

Hannah

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Celebrating Family!

This weekend was amazingly, wonderfully, fantasical!

My husband’s family is crazy, in an incredible way. This past weekend was the celebration of my hubby’s grandma’s 90th birthday. Family came from all over the country to celebrate her!  This celebration gave my boys their first taste of the crazy Tuimala clan. They had so many aunts, uncles, and cousins surrounding them that there was no chance to miss the family-ness.

The first part of the celebration made our family-ness very real to me, and hopefully to my boys. It was photo time! Little, 90-year-old Helen sat in a high-backed wooden chair as the photographed called up different combinations of family members.

- Just the kids…now the kids and their spouses…now the kids, their spouses, and the grand kids….now the kids, their spouses, the grand kids and their spouses….

You get the idea.

It was amazing to see this woman’s progeny surround her, one by one.

Finally, it was the great grand kids. That meant OUR BOYS!!!! What a thrill it was to see my two handsome boys join their cousins and surround their GG to be part of the family portrait. THEY ARE PART OF THE FAMILY!

I am so proud of the clan. They treated my boys as if they had always been a part. Many of us had not seen each other in five or six years, so there were so many changes, I guess two new boys didn’t really make a dent.

Anywho, I will definitely share more stories later, but for now, I celebrate the fact that my boys have found a clan to in which to belong.

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My rant for the day

BOO! BOO, HISS!

GRRRR!

GRRRR to the company!!! Boo to a company that is supposed to care for children but is putting the $$$ first! Boo to a company that won’t let a little boy go home because they can’t afford to lose the money he brings in! Boo to a supervisor who won’t stand up for what she knows is right just because her bosses will have a hissie fit!

YAY for the employees who are doing everything they can to stand up for what my son needs! TO GO HOME!!!

YAY for a God who knows my little boy’s heart and will gaurd him from any harm.

***Update***

I just got a call from the group home consultant. The 21st is the day. It was a good compromise. I kept my cool. YAY spirit of peace.

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Riding in cars with Gabe

I like Tuesdays.

Tuesdays are Soup Group days.

We get together with our spiritual family, love on each other, and spend some time in the Word. We heap loads and loads of encouragement on each other and, when necessary, offer guidance and correction. Gabe is now part of this family, and I am so thankful.

Gabe’s been making really poor choices lately, and before Soup Group I had lost my temper with him. He plays dumb and chooses not to face the mistakes he’s made, and it drives me KOOKOO! Anywho, I lost my temper. I had to buy some carpet shampoo, so as I wandered the aisles of the store I prayed out loud to “God, that boy makes me so angry. I’m sorry for losing my temper. Please show me how to love him. Please show me how to guide him. He can’t keep doing this. He is going to crash and burn. What do we do, God?”

I got in the car, apologized for yelling, hugged him, and we went to Soup Group. We studied Romans 2 and 3. Lots of law and grace stuff. Very heavy. Lots of assurance. It was good. We prayed together. I prayed that Kaleb and I would have wisdom of how to parent Gabe the way He would want us to. I prayed that Gabe’s heart would be transformed.

I love Tuesday nights, because the night sky and the 45 minute drive home allows openness and opportunity for hard conversations. We left Soup Group. The Holy Spirit came along for the ride. I asked Gabe to tell me what he dreams his life will be like when he is 25.

• He wants to be a mechanic.
• He wants to live in an apartment or a house on a lake in Minneapolis.
• He wants a loving, determined, faithful, trusting wife.
• He wants to be a loving, respectful, faithful, loyal, determined, trustworthy husband.

It was the door I needed. The door God opened.

We talked about the traits he would need in order to see that dream come true. We talked about how if he wants his wife to be able to trust him, if he wants to be a trustworthy husband he needs to start practicing being trustworthy now because it’s not a switch you can just flip on someday. That seemed to hit him.  With each dream, we talked about the CHARACTER TRAITS he would need to start developing NOW in order to achieve those dreams.

Here were the biggies:

• Trustworthiness (i.e. telling the truth, doing what you say you are going to do, taking responsibility etc…)
• Diligence (completing tasks well, even when they are hard. Pushing through the tough things without giving up)
• Time management (staying on task, completing things in a timely manner)

He asked about how to chose the right girl. We talked about prayer, and faith, and trust of the other person. I felt a tug on my heart to be very real with him. I told him how his heart has a lot of scar tissue on it right now that needs to be healed before he will be ready for that kind of relationship. I felt God whisper “Tell him how. Tell him how much I want to heal him.” So I did.

I pray Psalm 27:7-14  over my boys. I prayed it over Grace too, and still do. I read it to him, multiple times. I wanted him to hear God’s heart for him. Here’s the Gabe version.

Hear Gabe’s voice when he calls, O LORD;
be merciful to him and answer him.

⁸ His heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
Your face, LORD, he will seek.( I claim this in faith)

⁹ Do not hide your face from him,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been his helper. (even when he didn’t know you were there.)
Do not reject him or forsake him,
O God my Savior.

¹⁰ Though your father and mother forsake him,
the LORD will receive him .

¹¹ Teach him your way, O LORD;
lead him in a straight path
because of his oppressors.(which include his own thoughts, and habits, and hurts)

¹² Do not turn him over to the desire of his foes, (including the evil one, the world, and those who want to hurt him)
for false witnesses (including his very own thoughts) rise up against him,
breathing out violence.

¹³ I am still confident of this:
Gabe will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.

¹⁴ Wait for the LORD, Gabe;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

It’s in Gabe’s court now. God is there waiting. I will keep praying. I am so thankful for my 45 minute commute.

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