Switching it up
We are trying something different. We are starting Gabe out everyday with 12,000 points. It’s up to him whether he keeps it or not. This decision was made in a moment of clarity where Kaleb and I both agreed that we could not teach enough in the 2-3 hours we see Gabe in the evening to make it effective.
Rachel has been struggling with the whole concept of positive and negative points, so she hasn’t been teaching to him with much quantity during the day.
“He should just DO it.” she has said.
I understand it’s frustrating, but he needs a concrete way to see the effects of his behavior, and the point system is what he is used to. So we continue. He is half way through his subsystem. He’s earned enough points to skateboard and rollerblade in our driveway, so that’s a big accomplishment. 490,000 points to go. I’m hoping he will get some fire under his butt and take some initiative to get this done with.
Gabe had a good attitude last night. We all went out to the back yard and played frisbee for a while, and then a rousing game of 500, at which I won zero points. I tried, but geez I have a quick sister and son. Rachel snatched the foxtail right out of my hand in mid-jump. Sheesh! I was great to have some good family time and enjoy the (finally) beautiful UP weather.
I am hoping Gabe has a good attitude again tonight. He earns daily bonus points for attitude alone, and so far he is able to go 4 out of 7 days with an acceptable attitude. It’s the other three days that give us grief and headaches, when he totally crashes and shows no signs of emotion or motivation.
Lord, I know that it’s only been 3 months, but we could really use a significant breakthrough with this child. I love him, Lord. We both love him. But he is really hard to like right now. Please give us wisdom on how to speak to his heart. I’m tired of nagging and feeling bitchy. I don’t like feeling like that, Father. I want to enjoy this child you’ve given us. Kaleb’s exhausted and simply wants to connect with his son. Please, Lord, give us YOUR love and YOUR joy for this boy that you adore so much.
You are so good, God. You will astonish us again and again. Thank you, Father for your continual pictures of love. Amen.
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Hannah, have you read any of Beyond Consequences? I think there are two books out now though I have just read the one. They may help you, if anything, to find some peace in your parenting.
There are so many books and DVD’s that I want to add to our collection. That is definitely on the top of my list.
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